Something I've Always Known
by Currently Dating Spike
Summary: Jace/Clary. Set after the November excerpt from City of Glass, what could have happened. First fanfic.
1. Chapter 1

I do not own The Mortal Instruments series or any of it's characters. They belong to Cassandra Clare.

Set after the November excerpt from City of Glass. The italics is the end of the excerpt. The normal font is the fan fiction. Remember that someone has just died, someone important to everyone. This is my first fan fiction, and I spent hours trying to get it exactly right. I'm not entirely happy with it, but I don't think I did too badly. Hope you enjoy it!

_He sat down on the bed, facing her.  
Her chest tightened. "Is there bad news? Is everything—is everyone—"  
"It's not bad," said Jace, "and it's not news. It's the opposite of news. It's something I've always known, and you—you probably know it too."  
"Jace," she whispered suddenly, and for no reason she could identify, she was frightened of what he was about to say. "Jace, don't —"_

"Why not?" he asked, almost defiantly.

"Because it's impossible." Clary said, repeating the words she'd already told him after they'd kissed in the Seelie Court. A spark in his amber eyes told her that he remembered.

"That doesn't mean that we can't say it." His expression suddenly became intense, fierce even. "Clary, I _want _to say it. I _have _to say it. I can't keep it in anymore." There was a note of desperation in his voice.

"You have to. We both have to. Please, Jace, don't." she pleaded.

The fierce edge left his expression, to be replaced by a terrible sadness. "Clary, this—what's happened—it's made me realize that there's no _time_. If I don't tell you now, I might never get the chance. The time we have, it's precious. We don't get forever. Either one of us could disappear, so suddenly that no one could have seen it coming. We're mortal, Clary. We have to make the most of it."

Clary didn't reply. She looked down at her hands, where they still clutched the bed covers, and thought about what he'd said. She remembered what Luke had told her. _If you can't tell the truth to the people you care about most, eventually you stop being able to tell the truth to yourself._ She had rushed off to find him and tell him the truth. His words echoed in her mind, _I'll just be your brother from now on._ But hadn't she wanted to tell him how she felt?

When she looked back up at him, his eyes bored into hers. "I love you, Clary."

A lump rose in Clary's throat, and her eyes burned hotly. It was the first time either of them had said it, though they both must know it by now. All this time, she had never once even thought the word. Not about Jace. She thought back to when he'd been taken by Valentine, and she had come after him with a werewolf pack. When he had been imprisoned in the Silent City, and she had raced to free him. Admittedly, she would have done the same, if it had been Luke or Simon. Because she loved them. And now she admitted it, to Jace and to herself.

"I love you, Jace," she whispered.

At those words, the ferocity in him faded. His golden eyes grew very soft. All his features; his high cheekbones, his narrow mouth, his straight nose, suddenly seemed less sharp, softer, less defined. All traces of sarcasm and arrogance vanished from his face, to be replaced by an expression of absolute love. The moonlight from the open window turned his hair into a silver halo. He was so beautiful that he took Clary's breath away. He had never looked more like an angel than he did at that moment.

Without a word, Clary reached for him and hugged him. His arms wound around her back and pulled her closer. She leaned the side of her face into his soft curls, inhaling deeply. Her eyes slid shut as he stroked her hair. Neither of them said a word; they simply held each other. Clary knew that it was wrong to feel the way she did, but she finally accepted that it was not something she could control. For the moment, she was content to simply love Jace, to adore him as much as she possibly could. Whatever else they would have to suffer, Jace could always turn to her for comfort.

***

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	2. Chapter 2

Big thankyou to my reviewers!

***

Clary and Jace ended up lying side by side on the bed. Clary's head was resting on Jace's shoulder, with his arm around her and his cheek pressed into her hair. Neither of them had spoken for a long while. They didn't sleep, or close their eyes, staring sightlessly at the ceiling.

Jace was the first to break the peaceful silence. "What are we going to do, Clary?" he whispered.

Clary nestled into his shoulder, breathing in his smell. Soap and limes. "I suppose we do what we've been trying to do all this time," she replied softly.

Jace paused. "Do you think it's going to be easier now?" he asked. "Now that it's out in the open?"

Clary was sure of the answer. "No," she said firmly. "It definitely won't." Because despite the wordless understanding they'd come to, despite her knowing that it was wrong to desire him, lying with him on the bed was still not enough. She wanted to move closer, to wrap her arms around him and close the space between them. It wasn't a want, it was a need, a need that pressed insistently against her skin, driving her forwards.

Jace stroked her cheek gently. Against her will, her eyelids began to close, revelling at the sensation. Forcing them open, he turned to look at her. He still had the same adoring expression on his face, the same loving devotion in his eyes. Clary couldn't seem to look away. She had never seen him like this, never seen him so completely and utterly himself. He wasn't sarcastic, he wasn't menacing. For once, he was just letting himself feel what he felt, and she loved him for it. Gently, she caught his hand and pressed it against her face, letting her eyes slide shut.

He slid his fingers from her grip, running them softly down the side of her face and stroking her neck. Unconsciously, she tipped her head back in pleasure, a sigh escaping her lips. When she realized what they were doing, she opened her eyes in shock, recoiling from his touch.

"You should go," she murmured.

Gently, Jace removed his arm and slid off the bed. Clary turned and saw him hesitate.

"Do you mind if I stay for a while?" he asked, gesturing towards the armchair beside her bed. "I won't bother you."

She smiled at him. "Whatever you like, Jace." She said softly. Curling up and closing her eyes, she heard him seat himself in the armchair. His presence was comforting to her. She drifted to sleep, knowing that she was safe with him beside her, watching over her.

***

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	3. Author's Note

Author's note:

I can't really continue this story, because I know nothing about where they are in Idris, what's happening or what they would do next. It was just Clary and Jace confessing their feelings for each other (finally), not really a _story_. This was just a fun idea I had, my version of "How it Should Have Ended" (for those who've been to the website). I'll write another story when I have another idea, and any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

I can tell you that when Clary woke up the next morning, Jace was fast asleep in the armchair beside her bed. And he looked very cute.

Thankyou for reading and reviewing!!!


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